Watching this video triggered a thought for me, when and why did parents stop fighting for their kids? I mean aggressively fighting for them, not towards them but for them. Where were the other parents of those youth throwing rocks? And before we become too puffed-up, there are many who look on with disgust at a misbehaving child and criticize the parenting but when we see a parent trying to parent, we criticize that too. I recall one lovely shopping experience I painfully endured with my three little tots in tow; they may have been ages one, three and five at the time. They were tired and grumpy, not wanting to be in the grocery store, which meant I didn’t want to be there either. I can still see the older gentleman as I rounded the corner of the aisle, with the look of annoyance plastered on his face. He looked at those whiny kids whose mother obviously had no control and then his eyes shot up to me. He glared at me… I mean g l a r e d. That look was my breaking point. I said, “What?? Do you think I am having fun here?? Do you think this is fun for me? ‘Cause I assure you, it is not.” Shocked, he quickly bolted in the opposite direction, I imagine because he was thinking, “Wow. She’s going to snap!” A look that says, I have been there too, is much kinder than the look that implies you’re a failure because you can’t control your kid.
Let’s be clear— aggressive parenting is not abusive parenting. The Dictionary defines aggressive as ready and willing to fight. Aggressive Parenting is fighting for your child; abusive parenting is fighting your child, trying to control your child by force through aggression. Aggressive parenting also is not abusing your rights to fight for your child. When your child has done wrong, don’t fight for them to “get off the hook”. Aggressively seek the truth and help them learn the value of repentance and owning up to a mistake. Aggressive can also be defined this way: having or showing a bold forcefulness in the pursuit of a goal. Every parent should set goals for themselves. What kind of mother or father do I aspire to be? Ask yourself, do I have/show a bold forcefulness in the pursuit of the goals I’ve set as I raise my family? Also, don't be afraid to set goals for your kids. Make it a goal to instill good character within them. Now ask God to give you the wisdom and ability to press toward each goal you set.
Kids will have their moments: some will test and rebel, some will be easy and compliant… every child is different. They all need their parents, both mom and dad, to be active participants in their lives, fighting for them to live in this world that promises pleasure but often leaves them broken and discontented. So…I encourage every parent to …
Be aggressive as you seek to know your child; rules without relationship will result in rebellion.
Be aggressive as you seek to understand, encourage and “train them up in the way they should go”(Proverbs 22:6).
Be aggressive as you invest in them. Remember, your time is worth more than your money.
Be aggressive as you pray for them; never, never, never stop praying. Never.
Be aggressive as you seek God’s Word for yourself so that you can become the very best YOU possible. This will help you become the person He designed you to be so you can be the parent you desire to be.
But as for you, O man of God, flee from all these things; aim at and pursue righteousness (right standing with God and true goodness), godliness (which is the loving fear of God and being Christ like), faith, love, steadfastness (patience), and gentleness of heart. Fight the good fight of the faith; lay hold of the eternal life to which you were summoned and [for which] you confessed the good confession [of faith] before many witnesses (1 Timothy 6:11-12 AMP).
I can hear a cheer from my high school days repeating in my head; it went something like this: Be Aggressive, Be-e Aggressive, Be Aggressive, Be-e Aggressive…Listen…I’m cheering you on.