Kolleen Lucariello#TheABCGirl
Author. Writer. Speaker.
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Memories of Grandma

8/8/2012

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This past week, Pat and I surprised ourselves and installed a new tile floor in the kitchen. It was long overdue and worth every ache and pain our poor bodies endured. In preparation for the task, we needed to empty the kitchen out completely which included a little cabinet I have had in the corner since the death of my grandmother in 2003.  This cabinet is home to several items from my Grandmothers kitchen. When she died I found this cabinet in the dirt floor basement of her home and it was pretty beat up. I brought it to my house where I cleaned and painted it. Then I placed all I had gathered from her kitchen inside, where they have been for the past nine years. Once a year I take everything out and wash the dust off and clean it up. The floor project provided the opportunity for me to do just that. This time, however, as I washed and dried certain items, memories of my Grandmother flooded my mind.  When I opened the doors to the cabinet I sensed the smell of my Grandparents house and it was almost as though a movie reel began playing in my mind. I remembered rolling down the hill with my siblings and cousins. The big old walnut tree and the mints she always had waiting for us on the china cabinet. It took me back to my Grandpa putting his boots on to go out to the barn in the blue chair that sat under the medicine cabinet in the kitchen. I also reflected on the many long conversations with my Grandma about life, hers and mine. My Grandma was a really great listener. I could go to her mad as a hornet and she always had the time to sit for a chat and offer some godly counsel. As I worked to get each item back in the cabinet I began to realize the important roll she played in my life, and in my faith. Grandma’s bible was always by her chair and it was worn out. She was a woman of faith and prayer. I have no doubt she prayed hard for me. Then a realization hit me…I am now a Grandma. I looked at the cabinet and began to wonder, “what memories will my grandchildren hold in their hearts of me?”  Will they pull out a dish that was used at Papa and Grammy’s house on a holiday and be blessed with great memories of our times together? Will I be remembered for speaking kind words to them, offering a gentle listening ear, always making time for them? I sure hope so. 

I have raised three children and we have made many memories together. Some great, some good and some, well… might be best to forget.  Wouldn’t it be great to press a button and remove the memories of those failed moments as a parent? I would LOVE nothing more than to hit “delete” and have all of my ugly moments erased from memory, my kids and mine. Unfortunately there is no button for removal, but maybe being a grandparent is God’s way of redemption for the mistakes I made as a mom. Memory reveals all I would do differently, if given the chance and now as a Grammy, He has reminded me that I have been given a new opportunity to make memories with a little boy named Mason…and hopefully, one day, more grandchildren I am praying He has planned for us. After looking through the cupboard of memories I decided I would ask the Lord to show this  Grammy a game plan for making memories. Here's what I have so far...

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I want to create fun memories by having something special for them when we are together. When I went to visit my grandparents house,  I loved  sharing a cup of coffee in this little bitty white cup that matched theirs.  There was very little room for coffee, though, as I always had so much sugar and milk in the cup that when the liquid was gone I would tilt the cup over my mouth and gobs of sugar would just drop right in. I think when my grandbabies are old enough and come to visit, we will share a cup of coffee together to carry on the tradition. 

I will share my life with them like Grandma shared her life with me. I loved sitting with her and learning about the past. “Back in the day” stories are wonderful; we must not allow history to be forgotten in our families. Share your stories with your children and grandchildren. Often we don’t want to share the pain of mistakes with our kids; maybe we could help them bypass a few, by sharing a few of our experiences and all we have learned from them. Deuteronomy 32:7 tells us to “Remember the days of old,
 consider the years of many generations. 
Ask your father, and he will show you; 
Your elders, and they will tell you” (NKJV). Moses was giving his final instruction to the Israelites and he wanted them to remember what the Lord had done for them as they wandered in the desert. When our kids or grandkids ask us about the past, share life lessons with them. Help them consider the years of past generations by being authentic with them.
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I will Live out my faith before them. I never doubted my Grandmothers faith. Her bible sat next to her chair and it was worn from use. When the Israelites wandered in the desert, the Lord fed them with Manna, bread from heaven. The Lord gave Moses a command to “Fill a two-quart container with manna to preserve it for your descendants. Then later generations will be able to see the food I gave you in the wilderness when I set you free from Egypt.” (Ex. 16:32-34, NLT). My Grandmother fed herself the Word of God, it was her manna and as kids, we were able to see her set that example for us. I want my children and grandchildren to know that the Word of the Lord set me free from my bondage to Egypt. I want later generations to see the food, the manna, I ate came from my time in His Word. Our children and grandchildren need to see us spend our time in the Word so they can understand why it is important for them to do so, as well. 

I will love them. One of the greatest ways parents and grandparents can love their children is by learning how to love like God loves. John 3:16 is a great example of love..."For God loved the world so much that He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life." Love is giving and giving often means sacrifice.  We, as parents, give our time, our energy, our money, all of ourselves, when faced with the responsibility of raising a child.  I wasn't always willing to love sacrificially when raising my children...sigh...but I will redeem the time with the grandkids. 

Well, that is all the room I have on this blog, but, maybe you are a mom with young children reading this. I would just like to encourage you with this. It can be easy to grow weary of the constant demands of the little voices. Being a parent is hard and challenging. I would like to remind you now that you have one chance to train up a child in the way they should go, so that, when they are old they will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6). It is good to take some time and ask yourself what kind of children do you want to raise? What do you want their childhood memories to be? How do you want life for them to be different than it was for you? How can you raise them to discover the purpose God created them for? Make an intentional decision today to seek the Lord's wisdom so you can be the parent He designed you to be! 
Comments
    "...Exhort one another daily, while it is called 'Today,' 
    lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin
    " (Hebrews 3:13, NKJV).

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