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Fixed Eyes

6/29/2015

As I studied in my office, I could hear my four-year-old grandson, Mason, needed rescuing from his bad attitude, so wanting a walk myself, I asked his dad if he could join me. With his father's blessing, (and thanks) we took off down the road to take in some fresh air and hopefully, take on a new attitude. Mason was on his bike next to me, as we journeyed down the road a short distance to the entrance of the cemetery, where, for years, we’ve walked beside kids riding their bikes.

Working our way up and down the crisscrossing roads of the cemetery, I tried to keep Mason out of the large puddles of water left from the storm the night before. As you can imagine, it was next to impossible. He found riding through the puddles rather "cool" once he discovered the results of entering meant he could see the tire treads he was leaving behind as he exited. There was just one problem—while he was looking back at the tracks on the road— he drove off the road and into the grass—which began to frustrate him. He was trying to make it successfully down the road, but progress was delayed because his focus was behind him, rather than what was in front of him. Several times, I found myself reminding him that if we were ever going to make it to the end of the road, he had to keep his eyes forward. It was okay to take a quick glance back, but staying straight on the road, meant a quick glance back, not a steady stare. It wasn’t safe for him to peddle with his head looking behind him, if he was to avoid a crash; he had to keep his eyes forward.

As I walked behind Mason, watching him ride his little bike in and out of the puddles, I began to recall occasions I've ridden through some puddles of my own, left by the storms of life. Observing Mason looking behind himself, focusing on the marks he was leaving, rather than facing forward to where he was heading, caused me to admit that I too, have been guilty of turning my focus on the past. I've stared far too long at the damage of the storm and the painful marks on my heart that were left behind, rather than on what God has planned and prepared for my future. Mason’s steering off the road, because his eyes weren’t looking in the right direction, made me stop to consider the many collisions I might have avoided if my eyes had been looking forward, towards Christ, rather than keeping my eyes turned back, on my crisis. Sometimes we can become so focused on the pain of the past we fail to gaze intently, with hope, towards our future.

Just when I’d think we were heading in the right direction Mason would whirl his head around to see if he could still see any trace of his tracks. He pointed out to me that when he left the puddle the streak was dark, but only for a short time. Eventually it began to soften and fade, and slowly it completely disappeared. What a great revelation! One I could also relate to as there have been countless puddles that have left me with dark wounds. While some have faded more rapidly than others; through the gift of time, each wound softens and the hurt begins to fade, some injuries have indeed completely disappeared. If I choose to whirl my head around and focus my eyes on what lies behind me, I’m sure I would be able to see a few faint lines from those hurtful puddles. Where that leads, however, is off the path God desires for me and will eventually lead to a crash. I do not wish to crash, it’s hard getting back up.

As David fled the cave from King Saul's pursuit he wrote, "Be merciful and gracious to me, O God, be merciful and gracious to me, for my soul takes refuge and finds shelter and confidence in You; yes, in the shadow of Your wings will I take refuge and be confident until calamities and destructive storms are passed. I will cry to God Most High, Who performs on my behalf and rewards me [Who brings to pass His purposes for me and surely completes them]”(Psalm 57:1 AMP)!

What I desire more than anything are eyes that are fixed and focused on a Sovereign God, Who will be my refuge during the storms. Eyes that are fixed on a Loving God, Who wants to help me as I make my way out of the puddle and walk forward into His purposes for the future, using the pain of the storm to glorify Him.

Where are your eyes fixed? On the puddles of the past or are they looking, with hope, at the future? Don’t allow your progress to be delayed because you are focused on what is behind you; “Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you” (Proverbs 4:25 NLT).

Avoid staring at the past
Begin to fix your eyes forward
Casting "the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully" (1 Peter 5:7 AMP).

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The ABC's of Parenting; Care Package

6/2/2015

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Pat and I were cruising along the highway heading south in anticipation of our visit with our kids and my mind was racing with words that began with the letter C. With so many options, it was hard to know which one was the best. How would it be possible to pick just one? So, after some thought and conversation with the Lord, He gave me this—Care Package. We are going to thoughtfully assemble a Care Package: a package of useful or enjoyable items sent or given as a gift to someone who is away from home. Let’s consider children our Care Packages to fill up with useful and enjoyable items, with the goal of sending them out into the world, as gifts to others when they are away from home. They might include enjoyable items such as Compassion, Consideration, and Commitment and useful items such as Contentment, Correction, and Confidence. Then, when asked about their hope as a believer, they would always be ready to explain it (1 Peter 3:15 NLT). They could also become a light shining in the darkness (John 1:5).

Putting compassion in our care packages would help our children feel the sorrow and pain of others. Throughout the Gospels, Jesus was often moved with compassion by the needs of others, and offered help and healing to the crowds gathered around Him. As parents, let’s help nurture the same compassionate, tender heart within our children that Jesus modeled. Is it possible for them to discover what compassion looks like through your example? How can we help our children to be moved with compassion when they see the suffering of others? A good place to begin might be teaching them about kindness and when they are unkind, tell them.

A Care Package that holds consideration within it has a desire to avoid doing something that will cause another person pain, and will also give careful thought as he/she endeavors to make decisions. We must help our children understand the importance of giving careful—prayerful—thought before making quick decisions; spur-of-the-moment decisions can hold lasting, devastating results. A great verse to study with them is Proverbs 14:15: “Fools believe every word they hear, but wise people think carefully about everything” (ERV). It would be refreshing to bring up a wiser generation; one that holds a sincere desire to avoid believing every word they’ve heard or behaving in a manner that might cause another pain. They must also be taught the importance of consideration because with every decision comes a consequence.

Sending out a Care Package that holds a high regard for commitment would be most enjoyable to many these days—including marriage partners and business owners — even our kids. Teaching our children to honor a commitment helps them understand the value of their word and recognize the importance of loyalty. If they (we), understood commitment better, they (we) would appreciate why making wise decisions is important. Don’t allow your child to quit in the middle of a commitment. Help them grow into faithful, loyal, adults by encouraging them to stick it out until the end (unless, of course, there is danger involved). How can we expect them to “commit everything they do to the Lord” (Psalm 37:5 NLT) if we don’t teach them what commitment means? Do they see commitment from you?

A useful item in our Care Package might be helping them discover the gift of contentment. In a world that influences us to believe “more is better,” “more” soon becomes, “never enough.” The need for more toys, more snacks, more friends, more clothes, more events, more socializing, more popularity, more money, more tattoos, more, more; just give me more. Raising children to believe they are entitled to have whatever they want, whenever they want it, is just not wise; nor is it God’s best. Paul wrote he “learned how to be content with whatever he had” (Philippians 4:11 NLT). He also told Timothy that “true godliness with contentment is itself great wealth” (1 Timothy 6:6 NLT). Don’t walk into the store having told them they weren’t getting a toy and walk out with one because of a temper tantrum. If they don’t learn how to be content while they are young, how will they ever be content with where God has them? Are they able to see a life of contentment through you?

Another useful gift would be teaching them how to accept and appreciate correction. “People who accept discipline are on the pathway to life, but those who ignore correction will go astray” (Proverbs 10:17 NLT). I think one of the hardest components of parenting is consistency in correction. While going head-to-head with a determined three-year-old can be wearisome, it is important to remain steadfast in the fight, so that when you go head-to-head with a stubborn 13-year-old, they know who’s in charge. Don’t be afraid to tell your kids “no,” their ears need to hear it from you… and others. Correction doesn’t need to be “heavy-handed” and demeaning, just loving and consistent. Remember this bit of advice from wise old King Solomon, “To discipline a child produces wisdom, but a mother is disgraced by an undisciplined child” (Proverbs 29:15 NLT). If they can’t learn to appreciate correction from those in authority, how will they ever trust that the Lord disciplines those He loves? Are you helping them become teachable?

Let’s tuck one more useful item in our Care Packages by imparting the gift of confidence within them. Not in THEM, which leads to arrogance, but confidence in the Lord and what He is capable of doing in them and through them. I’ve fallen in love with this verse from Jeremiah 17: “Blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence” (vs. 7 NLT). Because we live in a fallen world, we endure hardship; we suffer great losses and unbearable circumstances. Sometimes life doesn’t go the way we had envisioned or planned. Filling our children up with confidence in the Lord helps them place their hope in Him when life may seem dark and hopeless. Confidence is a feeling or belief that you can do something well or succeed at something. Let’s change that up a bit by giving them the ability to see that God always does things well because His way is perfect (Psalm 18:30). He can succeed in bringing good out of any bad situation because He is faithful (1 Corinthians 1:9). Prepare them for battle by instilling in them the knowledge that, no matter what circumstances may come their way, they can “be confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6 NKJV).

Prepare to send....
A
Bountiful
Care package

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